Zombie Apocalypse Weapon Choice: Handgun or Machete?

In a hypothetical zombie apocalypse where 95% of humanity has turned into undead ghouls, the choice of weapon could mean the difference between life and death. Two options are presented - a 92G handgun with unlimited ammunition, or a Chinese machete with unbreakable durability.

On the surface, the handgun seems the clear choice. Firearms provide range, stopping power, and ease of use. As one respondent noted, “Even a regular 92G with three magazines, I’d still choose the 92G. In an encounter, the one with the machete would be instantly killed by the 92G.” The machete’s utility appears limited to slashing and requires close quarters combat.

However, the handgun has critical limitations. While ammo is infinite, the weapon itself is not. Typical 92G models have a service life of around 3,000-5,000 rounds with proper maintenance. In a prolonged apocalypse, parts wear and malfunction is inevitable. As one knowledgeable commenter explained, “Believe me, mass-produced handguns in our country definitely don’t have that lifespan. 3000 rounds and you’d be thanking the gods of fortune.”

In contrast, an indestructible machete, while lacking range, provides permanent close-quarters reliability. It doesn’t jam, misfire, or run out of ammo. As one prepper reasoned, “I can easily go out and find another machete later. Or rather, I don’t even need to go out and look, because I have a large number of knives and melee weapons at home.” For those trained in melee combat, a machete paired with a defensive implement like a shield provides a potent and reusable zombie-killing combination.

Noise is another major consideration. Gunfire is guaranteed to attract zombies and hostile survivors alike. While suppressors muffle muzzle blast, they don’t eliminate mechanical action noise. “Even if you install a suppressor…cold knowledge: gun suppressors only eliminate some of the sound and muzzle flash during firing. It’s impossible to achieve that whispering sound in the movies, so it’s still a zombie attractor,” one gun enthusiast warned. Blades, in contrast, are silent.

Ultimately, while high-powered and beguilingly simple, firearms have limited sustainability in a zombie apocalypse. An indestructible machete, while requiring skill and stamina to wield, can overcome hordes indefinitely without risk of mechanical failure or attracting undue attention. As one pragmatist put it, “Guns aren’t for fighting zombies in the doomsday. I can use a gun to force others to charge.” Melee weapons like machetes are the true long-term solution against the undead. Choice of weaponry is just the first calculation in surviving a zombie apocalypse. </assistant_response>