Working hard all the time without being recognized by the boss, feeling down as soon as stepping into the office, should I consider quitting?
The Misconceptions of the Working Class: Bosses Will Recognize Hard Work, But Often They Don’t.
Many working class individuals have a misconception:
“As long as I work hard, my boss will definitely recognize me.”
They like to deceive themselves, often emphasizing how difficult it is for them to work overtime and how challenging their job is. They even believe that hard labor is synonymous with progress and achievement.
A typical characteristic is their love for posting about their overtime on social media.
“The east is bright, the project is finally finished.”
“No break at noon, the struggle of a working class!”
They enjoy motivational quotes, such as “What goes around comes around” and “All that glitters is gold.” They believe that as long as they bury themselves in their work and diligently work overtime, their boss will take notice, remember, and then promote and give them a raise by the end of the year, as it should be.
In short, everything they do and think is always from their own perspective: I did it, I’m tired, I worked hard, so the boss should know, should be grateful, and should reward me.
If the boss doesn’t show any appreciation, then they must be a heartless boss.
However, they rarely ponder over three questions.
1. Did the boss see it when you did it yourself?
Sorry, for many supportive positions that are not numerical or result-oriented, it is true that if the boss didn’t see it, it’s as if you didn’t do it.
For example, if you organize a very good training session on your own, but you didn’t inform the boss in advance and he didn’t participate on-site, do you think he will magically know?
You mentioned that your colleagues attended, but did they give positive feedback? Did their feedback reach the boss? No? Do you think the boss will be all ears and know that your training was great?
Impossible.
2. Did the boss approve of working overtime?
Many people like to show off their overtime work, but the boss actually knows what’s really going on.
Some overtime work is actually due to the inefficiency of the employees, and can only be completed by working additional hours.
Some overtime work is actually due to redundant tasks that could have been avoided if there was better communication among the employees.
Some overtime work is even due to employees working in the wrong direction because they failed to communicate with the boss; it’s a complete waste of time and effort.
If you were the boss, would you approve of these absurd overtime hours?
Of course not. Many of these overtime hours are caused by the employees themselves, not only exhausting them but also wasting the company’s electricity. Ineffective overtime work can even affect the employees' mental state and hinder the company’s progress.
In the past, there was a peculiar employee in my team who would always come to me to complain and vent after working these extra hours. At that time, I was too kind-hearted to point out that her overtime work was ineffective, fearing that it would dampen her enthusiasm.
Until one day, she used these overtime hours as a reason to repeatedly ask for a promotion and raise. There was no choice but to let her go.
Because hard work does not always lead to success.
3. Did you do a good job? Does it meet the boss’s expectations?
Some “honest people,” after receiving a task, just put their heads down and work, rarely looking up, especially during and after the task.
During the task, they don’t look up. They don’t communicate with the boss and synchronize progress. If there is a deviation in the work, they won’t be able to correct it. By the time the deadline arrives, the problem is discovered but it’s too late to remedy it. This is what frustrates the boss the most.
After the task, they don’t look up. They don’t evaluate the success or failure of the work. Without reflection, they won’t be able to do better or faster next time. When faced with similar difficulties again, they might have to start from scratch, which greatly affects efficiency.
Honestly, post-task review is what bosses like the most. If a method and framework are established, even if another colleague does similar tasks in the future, they can learn from it. This makes the team more efficient.
Bosses don’t appreciate employees who just work without thinking. They are more satisfied with employees who think for the whole team and contribute to its future development.
To be honest, if you haven’t thought through these three issues, no matter where you go, you may encounter problems that the boss doesn’t approve of. It’s because you are just jumping from one hole to another, without truly cleaning off the dirt.
Work Expectations, Self-Expectations, and Future Prospects
We cannot only focus on pulling the cart while keeping our heads down. We also need to raise our heads and look at the road ahead. This road has at least three meanings: the expectations of the boss, our own expectations, and the expectations for the future—whether we can lay a solid foundation for our future career now.
I. Boss’s Expectations
In the workplace, we often see employees busy all day long, but when asked what they are busy with, they are at a loss. And when it comes to monthly reports and year-end summaries, they become even more bewildered, feeling that their mundane work doesn’t carry much weight.
Try starting from the following aspects:
First, understand what the boss wants to achieve, how to achieve it, and how to assist him in achieving it. At least, understanding these questions will give your work direction. Every effort you make will hit the boss’s concerns. Why wouldn’t he approve?
Then, communicate with the boss while working, adjust the direction of your work, fill in the gaps, and ensure that you deliver the results that meet the boss’s final expectations. Look, he will be absolutely delighted.
Finally, develop the habit of periodically communicating with the boss, reviewing your performance, and clarifying the expectations for the next step. During these conversations, seek advice, express your thoughts, clear any misunderstandings, and strengthen your relationship with the boss.
If you can do the above, you will at least gain some recognition from the boss. You won’t end up feeling down when you step into the office, and you won’t even consider quitting. It’s an unworthy negative cycle.
II. Self-Expectations
Work is not just about making money or honing our skills. It’s also about further improving our professional abilities and acquiring the essential skills to survive and grow in society. At the same time, work is also a form of practice that helps a person become more enlightened.
Seeking the boss’s approval is obviously only part of the job. What expectations do you have for yourself? Have you learned anything through this job? Are you growing and making progress every day?
Are you leveraging your strengths? Are you addressing your weaknesses appropriately? From your boss and colleagues, what can you learn from their ways of thinking and working?
If you frequently ponder these questions at work and put them into practice, you will inevitably have daily achievements and experience the joy of growth and progress. You will be enthusiastic when facing work.
III. Expectations for the Future
Work shouldn’t only be about the present or whether the boss currently approves or disapproves. You should always have a clear plan for your career. It may seem too far-sighted to plan for ten or twenty years ahead, but at the very least, you should have a five-year plan.
It’s completely feasible to become an experienced professional or even a specialist in your industry within five years through hard work. If opportunities are favorable, you could later rise to become a top-tier management talent or expert in your field.
Alternatively, if you don’t particularly enjoy your current field, you should make efforts towards the field you truly love. Dedicate a certain amount of time every day to learning and practicing in that field. This is more important than the approval of your boss in the short term.
In conclusion, each person’s career typically spans at least thirty years. Within these thirty years, the approval of the boss or colleagues is not as important as self-recognition.
Work Standards and Leadership Expectations
When it comes to work standards, it is important to avoid having a narrow mindset.
This narrow mindset consists solely of “approval from the boss”.
If that’s the case, when you encounter situations like these, you’ll be stuck in a dead-end and unable to find a way out.
When assigned a task by a leader, the first thing you should do is have a management mindset regarding their expectations. In other words, when you receive a task, don’t set too high of an expectation for the leader. If you end up not meeting their expectations, the leader will instinctively think that you lack the ability.
You can bring up difficulties and certain situations, emphasize your attitude, and at the end of the task, you can take a look at the leader’s feedback.
Every leader has their own way of doing things, and after a while, you will discover how they treat their other colleagues.
You will understand their general expectations for a task.
If they are the type of person who is not particularly satisfied with anyone’s work and frequently “criticizes” their subordinates.
Then if you seek recognition from this type of leader, you are only inviting trouble upon yourself.
For a task, a position, how well it is done depends not only on the leader’s evaluation, but also on your understanding of the position and self-assessment.
There are multiple dimensions to doing a task.
Especially for positions that require support and assistance, it is not something that one person can handle perfectly. You need to know your own strengths and weaknesses.
Putting in effort, sometimes in a blunt way, is like self-admiring.
The definition of effort for you might not be the same as how the leader sees it.
There is a colleague who does administrative work. She has been working overtime for years, believing that she has made enough effort, and the leader also approves of her.
However, in reality, the leader thinks that working overtime every day is a problem with efficiency and ability.
The leader even brought this up during a meeting.
This deeply saddened and discouraged her.
In fact, in the workplace, work is just work. It does not need to be accompanied by too many personal subjective emotions.
You might think that by making an effort you can gain recognition from others, just like in a romantic relationship, where you think that being good to someone will always yield positive results. These are all too simplistic ways of thinking.
In this world, success does not have a formula. It’s not “As long as I do XXX, then I can XXX”.
If that were the case, then everyone in society would be pursuing a better life together.
It is precisely because things are complex and require multiple reference points that we need to be able to look at things from different angles.
Are you putting in effort at work just to gain the boss’s approval and favor?
Shouldn’t the purpose of your hard work be the accumulation of your own goals and abilities?
If the leader doesn’t approve, what is the reason? Is it truly because you fall far short of their standards, your abilities are lacking, or is it because of a misunderstanding, a problem with how you reported, or a lack of communication skills?
Among these factors, there are key reasons. As long as you clarify them, you can improve upon the areas that need it.
If the leader simply takes issue with your appearance, aura, or tries to analyze your fortune based on your birth date.
Then no matter how hard you try, it’s pointless. Just leave.
Immersing oneself in this cycle of seeking approval, feeling bad emotionally, and losing motivation at work will inevitably wear you down.
It is better to turn passivity into proactivity, keep an eye out for opportunities, and find the reasons in a timely manner!
The Importance of Boss’s Recognition
Do you work for your boss’s recognition? Does your boss’s recognition mean having enough to eat and wear?
Last night, I had dinner with a friend. We were happily eating when her phone rang. The caller had a strange name: “My scumbag boss.”
Hey, something’s up. Is she having some kind of issue with her boss? Is she about to get into a relationship? Should I give her a big red envelope as a gift? My mind started to wonder, and I didn’t pay attention to what she was saying on the phone.
When the call ended, I was about to ask, “What’s going on with you and your boss?” But before I could ask, I saw the grim look on her face and heard her sighing.
I didn’t know how to ask further, so I just silently ate my food. However, she didn’t touch her chopsticks after the call.
“Come on, there’s still so much food. Why aren’t you eating?”
She shook her head. “I’ve lost my appetite.”
“Why did you lose your appetite? Aren’t these dishes your favorite? Spicy beef and sour fish…”
She sighed helplessly. “I don’t feel like eating after talking to my boss.”
“You mean that scumbag?”
“Yes, he’s a scumbag. When I first joined the company, he talked nicely and looked good. I fell for his charm. Now I’m just an office clerk, practically working as his 24-hour secretary and nanny…”
Okay, it seems like I won’t be giving her that red envelope. Judging by her angry expression, there’s probably nothing between her and her boss. Instead, it’s her boss who’s good at deceiving people.
“Then why don’t you quit? Even though the end of the year is approaching, if what you say is true, your year-end bonus might just vanish…”
“Sigh, we agreed when I joined that my position is important and I have to give a three-month notice if I want to quit.”
“Girl, do you only know three words when it comes to labor laws? Three months? Where did you get that idea?”
“I’ve been really busy lately, and I can’t find anyone to replace me. Should I wait until after the New Year?”
“…You win, you’ve actually thought about your boss so much. No wonder he sees you as his right-hand person.”
“When I think about going to work, I feel miserable. I get criticized every day, and if I don’t get criticized for a day, I start to think something’s not right… He says I won’t be able to find a better job elsewhere. Only he doesn’t mind my job abilities… Now, if my phone doesn’t ring on Saturdays and Sundays, I think my phone is broken…”
The brain is said to be 80% water, and this quote is not trying to deceive me. If this girl starts shaking, there will definitely be a clattering sound.
I finally understand now. Women are too emotional. When they are pursued by seemingly refined and easygoing male bosses, they always fall for their tricks.
“Listen, once you switch jobs, just find a non-profit organization. If we’re going to work, we might as well do charity work and genuinely make a difference. You need to go out and find your own value in the job market…”
Sometimes, not being recognized is just a tactic that bosses use.
How to Analyze Work Problems
Of course, you shouldn’t quit just yet because you haven’t identified the problem yet. If you resign and start a new job, you can’t guarantee that you won’t encounter the same situation again.
Don’t quit to escape, as you will never be able to progress in your career without identifying the problem.
Due to the lack of a specific description, it’s difficult to conduct a detailed analysis. From the title alone, there could be a multitude of possible reasons, such as not reporting your work well, simply fulfilling tasks without taking responsibility for the outcomes, or your boss lacking the ability to plan a suitable career path for you, even treating you as cannon fodder, and so on.
It’s impossible to analyze each individual situation specifically, but I believe there is only one key factor:
Whether your work has generated value recognized by your boss.
You must understand that the money the company pays you comes from the money the company earns through its business. In other words, the more money you make for the company, the more money the company will allocate to you.
This general rule will never change, but the way different positions demonstrate value to the company may vary. Some departments directly generate revenue, while others are responsible for cost reduction, and some departments spend money but provide indispensable support for business operations.
So, this is the first question you need to consider: based on your position, analyze what value you bring to the company.
If you find yourself immersed in the tasks assigned by your leader every day and unable to break free, I suggest that you, even if it means delaying some tasks, take the time to seriously reflect on this question, as it is crucial for your personal development in this position.
Many newcomers work hard and think they have made great efforts, believing that their boss will definitely notice and promote them with a salary increase.
In reality, a boss will only promote and give salary increases in one situation: when you bring greater benefits to the boss and they are willing to share a portion of those benefits with you.
The classic example is a sales commission. If you bring in $10,000 in revenue for the company, the company will give you a percentage from that $10,000 as your performance-based income.
This is a relatively straightforward example and one where the value is easily quantifiable. However, not all positions are like sales, where you can directly see what you have brought to the company through numbers. In such cases, you need to consider:
The second question is: has your leader seen and acknowledged this value?
In this case, reporting is crucial. I have encountered many colleagues in middle and back-office positions whose workload is no less than that of their colleagues in client-facing roles, yet their contributions are difficult to measure.
That’s why the best among them are particularly skilled in “managing up,” which means they are always pondering one question: how can I make my boss recognize the work I do?
Therefore, they are all masters of reporting, often writing PowerPoint presentations to explain their progress to their leaders. Their weekly and monthly reports are breathtaking.
Of course, I am not advocating that you become proficient in PowerPoint, but emphasizing the importance of reporting. After all, I have made the mistake myself in the past, focusing only on work and forgetting to report to my boss, which resulted in low efficiency, not bringing much benefit to the company, and exhausting myself in the process.
Once you have clarified these two questions, you can roughly determine where the problem lies. Is it in your work methods? Or have you really encountered a difficult boss?
If it is the latter, it’s best to leave early. If it is the former, then adjust your work methods, because otherwise, no matter how many times you change companies, you will still face the same outcome.
Self-Assessment and Decision-Making
Let’s start with a sample exercise.
Check in the following order:
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Did your efforts clearly meet your boss’s expectations or show obvious performance in objective parameters (such as sales)?
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If the answer to the first point is no, then the results of your efforts are uncertain or unclear.
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If the answer to the first point is objectively clear, check if you clearly informed and demonstrated your results to your leader.
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If the third point is not met, please improve your upward management skills, learn how to package and showcase your abilities and achievements.
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If the third point is met but the leader does not recognize it, please go back and check the first point. Also consider a few questions (these represent some possibilities):
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Is it possible that your current job is easily replaceable by others, and its importance and impact in the entire business are not high?
- If so, consider learning and changing to a more important role or field.
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Is it possible that your leader is worried that acknowledging your efforts will lead to you asking for a raise or job change, so intentionally suppresses your achievements?
- The test method is simple, send out your resume to other companies and see what positions and salary you can get through interviews.
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Is it possible that your leader’s focus is not on the business, but on other aspects, such as being obsessed with upward management or just getting by?
- If so, find ways to change departments or lower your expectations for leader recognition.
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Is it possible that what you consider as your efforts and achievements are not aligned with your leader’s true needs, so the actual results are not important to him?
- If so, observe how the people he approves of and praises understand his language and work arrangements, and figure out the leader’s jargon and true needs.
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Is it possible that the leader treats everyone like this - does he have a psychological problem?
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After checking, conduct a self-assessment and make a decision to stay or leave.
Find the root cause of the problem and prescribe the right medicine.
Do not rely solely on appearances to guess the prescription.
For reference.
Personal Effort and Leadership Expectations
The reason why hard work does not receive recognition from leaders may be because the results delivered by oneself do not meet the expectations of the leaders.
In theory, it sounds simple but in practice, it is difficult. The difficulty lies in the fact that you cannot grasp the expectations of the leaders, as expectations may be dynamic.
In fact, the “Kano Model” can explain the relationship between “personal effort” and “leadership expectations” very well.
The Kano Model was originally used in the field of marketing to explain how businesses satisfy customer needs. In the workplace, we can treat leaders as customers and ourselves as businesses serving customers. The principle of serving superiors as subordinates is the same as businesses serving customers.
The Kano Model defines four levels of needs: basic needs, expected needs, exceeded needs, and reverse needs.
Basic needs: These are the requirements that leaders expect subordinates to fulfill.
For example, if a leader asks you to prepare a report, ensuring the accuracy of the data is a basic need. You may have stayed up all night to ensure the accuracy and timeliness of the data, feeling that you have put so much effort into your work and the leader should praise you. However, in reality, the leader will not increase their satisfaction just because the data is error-free. On the contrary, if there are errors in the data or if it is delivered late, the leader’s satisfaction will inevitably decrease significantly.
Therefore, at this time, you should not be disappointed. Instead, you should think about easier ways to process the data and make your work process easier.
Expected needs: These are the needs that reflect the level of satisfaction and fulfillment of the leader’s requirements.
For example, the leader discovers a new project, but there are only 5 days left until the bidding deadline. Now, the leader asks you to complete the proposal in three days. If you work hard without sleeping or eating for 24 hours and submit a draft of the proposal the next day, the leader’s satisfaction will greatly increase due to your efforts. On the other hand, if you delay the delivery due to getting caught up in certain details and thereby reduce the time for revisions, the leader’s satisfaction will decrease significantly.
For the current situation, the faster you present the proposal, the more time there will be for discussion, organization, modification, and the higher the probability of winning the bid.
Therefore, before starting work, it is important to clearly identify the key points that deserve attention and then focus on them accordingly.
Exceeded needs: These are unexpected needs from the leader. If these needs are not met, the leader’s satisfaction will not decrease. However, if a certain need is met, the leader’s satisfaction will increase significantly.
For example, if the leader asks you to make a PowerPoint presentation, but you also write a speech script based on the presentation, the speech script would be an exceeded need. In general, not writing it is fine, but if you do write it, it exceeds expectations.
You can imagine exceeded needs as Plan B. No one can always meet the leader’s exceeded needs right from the start. The reason is either the lack of capability to provide exceeded needs or the absence of the thinking and habits of providing exceeded needs.
Therefore, the ability to meet exceeded needs is like “hitting two birds with one stone.” Only when you often prepare Plan B, possess the ability and thinking of Plan B, can you produce exceeded results at critical moments.
Reverse needs: The leader does not have such needs. If you insist on providing these needs, the leader’s satisfaction will decrease. This is unnecessary and adds complications.
For example, when the leader assigns a task, giving you direction, objectives, processes, and methodologies, and only requires you to implement them step by step and report the results on time to complete the task.
You may see this as an opportunity to showcase yourself. So you study the work carefully and try to optimize the process to speed up the progress, hoping to surprise the leader. However, you fail to realize that your understanding and thoughts are too one-sided, resulting in risks and delays in the work process, which leads to the leader’s dissatisfaction.
Therefore, before you have matured in your abilities or truly understood the leader, do not blindly try to impress the leader with your efforts. Being clever without careful consideration can lead to mistakes.
To conclude, all four types of needs require effort, but it is important to switch between them according to different situations. Only by using them appropriately can one be wise. On the other hand, acting without thinking and without making adjustments is reckless behavior.
Recognition of Effort and Merit Varies with Company Size
Effort does not necessarily result in significant achievements, and in the workplace, merit does not equal hard work.
Whether or not you can be seen and recognized by your boss depends on the size of the company you work for.
If your company is a listed conglomerate with tens of thousands of employees, and you are a grassroots employee, no matter how hard you work and even if you stay overtime until midnight, the probability of your boss noticing you is very low. Unless you work right next to your boss’s office, otherwise, even after you retire, your boss may not even know who you are.
If your company is a small or micro business with dozens or a few tens of employees, your boss may still not recognize your work. There are two possibilities for this. The first is that the work you do is truly unnecessary, with strong substitutability, and it doesn’t matter if you do it or not. The other possibility is that you actually do a good job, but you and your boss don’t get along well. In plain terms, your boss doesn’t think highly of you, so they may use you to do the work, but they have no intention of giving you any emotional value, recognition, praise, or encouragement.
Whether or not your work is good and whether or not you are capable cannot be judged solely based on your boss’s attitude. It can also be evidenced by achievements, such as performance and completion of projects.
Do not set too narrow a standard to judge yourself and do not rely entirely on others' evaluations to determine the value of what you do.
Look inward more, make judgments based on facts, prove yourself through results, and strengthen your self-confidence.
During tough economic times, when it’s hard to find a job, do not resign easily.